chelleybones

The weather forecast for the day said rain. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to take the baby out on our morning walk. I still put on my workout gear first thing this morning and laced up my shoes. I normally wait for the baby to take his nap so I can workout on the treadmill and do some weights. Instead I got on here on Buddy Slim and decided to read some blogs. Last night I had decided I would like to make my time more useful and sneak in more workouts throughout my day. After reading each blog I would do 50 jumping jacks. I got through the most previous blogs at the time and had managed to burn 100+ calories. Not a bad way to get in an easy 10 minute workout. Needless to say my calves, thighs, buns, abs, back, and shoulders are all sore tonight. This is from a combination of this week’s hard work but mostly from all of the jumping jacks I’ve been doing the past two days. It’s great. I use to HATE them but now I LOVE them. I’ve also started lifting my knees higher as I walk through the house while bringing my arms up and down at the same time. I believe all of these little add ons throughout the day are going to add up. There are more things I am doing on top of my workouts too.

Here’s the latest on my father. He’s going to be in ICU for about one more week and then he will be transferred to a rehab center where he will learn how to walk and do all of his everyday functions again. Today was the first day of his speech therapy class and his therapist talked to me and told me how frustrated he is that he can’t relay what’s on his mind. All that is coming out is grumbling. Since he’s at the Veterans Hospital and everything is paid for by them they told me that he’ll be staying there until he makes a full enough recovery to be released. He’s looking at least a year there. Because Jason is not getting to come home tomorrow I’ll see him in a week and a half before we can head back to Tucson, AZ to see my dad. I can’t go yet since I don’t have anyone to watch the baby for me during the days since he’s not allowed in the hospital. Still taking it one day at a time. Thank you for everyone’s continue support.

Here’s an update on my father: Monday he went in for his craniotomy for the brain anuerysm and everything went well. He was put in ICU for recovery and was kept under a watchful eye. Yesterday I received a call from my uncle at 7:30 p.m. First words out of his mouth were, “Listen to what I have to say.” He spoke very slowly and quietly. He went on to tell me my father had a severe stroke that took his speech and full body functions. He went in for a CT scan and found that his brain is still functioning though. Luckily, they were able to give him blood pressure meds immediately and that helped stabilize him quicker. The best place to have a stroke is when you’re already in the hospital. The neurosurgeon informed my uncle that my dad will have to go through physical and speech therapy. This is going to be a long long road ahead. With my father going to be unable to work when he gets released from the hospital he will be coming to live with Jason and I and take on those responsibilities to take care of him. He’s only 56 and was a very physically active man and it pains me to see his life almost being taken from him. I’m still taking it one day at a time and keeping my hopes high. It’s when all hope is lost that the battle is lost. My dad is my best friend.

I told Jason last night that now I understand why when I was younger and my grandfather was going through chemo why I wasn’t allowed to go see him. When my grandfather passed I have only good memories with him. I’ve seen my father suffering in the hospital and all of what he’s going through and this is not the way I want to remember him. I know everyone is going to tell me to only think of the good times with him but I’m sure those of you who have experienced this can relate that those images of them in the hospital are what sticks out more in your mind. I just want him to get through this and enjoy the rest of his years. Snap of the fingers right? I wish. For now I’m just staying positive even through the emotional outbursts.

Ahh! Nothing like a good cry, a glass of sangiovese, and some dark chocolate.

Sure today I went overboard with indulging and steered myself down a different path than I had intended but sitting here right now slightly more relaxed than I’ve been the last couple nights is well worth it.

I’m accepting to take everything one day at a time and handle only what’s on my plate at the moment rather than stressing about the what coulds and what ifs. It could just be the wine that is putting me in a relaxed mindset.

Father update: I heard from him first thing this morning. Nothing is going on today other than still under the watchful eyes of the nurses and doctors. He’ll be getting prepped for surgery tomorrow and he’s getting a craniotomy which is an 8 hour procedure. They remove a piece of skull and then spread the brain tissue apart and place a tiny metal clip across the neck to stop the blood flow into the aneursym. After it is clipped the bone is secured in place and the wound is closed.

Let me catch everyone up who haven’t already heard… On Friday I was heading to Tucson, AZ to visit my dad for the weekend for his birthday. As I was driving into town I called his cell phone and he informed me I needed to make a detour to the Veterans Hospital. My heart sank even though his voice was so calm. When I arrived his wife greeted me and took the baby so I could go in and see my father. When I saw him he informed me that he was having horrible headaches, chest pain, nausea, and collapsed. Before I arrived there they had done a CT scan and found that he has a brain aneursym that is leaking and luckily that it had not ruptured. He could have been killed.

Saturday I only got to see my father for 10 minutes. No one would watch the baby long enough for me to get some good quality time in with him. Finally I was able to go for an hour while my stepsister watched him for me. Seeing the fear in my father’s face brought me to tears. I was trying to hold it together in front of him but I finally broke down. I finally got it together. I helped him prepare his hospital dinner. I gave him loves goodbye as my hour ended.

Sunday morning my father had called me bright and early after his wife had left the hospital. He informed me that she was nagging him about the way our relationship is and how she thought I was crying because I was jealous of her. How our relationship is? That a father and daughter shouldn’t act the way we do. The way we do? What? Laugh, joke, cry, enjoy one another’s time? He said she was causing his blood pressure to rise which could cause him a stroke. I had no idea that she was having jealousy issues with me since I’d only been there two days and seen him a total of an hour and 20 minutes while she had been there 24 hours a day since he was admitted. If anyone shouldn’t I be the one jealous of her. But I wasn’t. A daughters role is so much more different than that of a wife. She doesn’t believe a daughter should do anything the wife is capable of doing.

Still on Sunday morning… I was on the phone with Jason when she walked into the room I was in without knocking and got in my face while I was crying to Jason about my decision to leave. She would not back off and my heart was starting to pound fast. I was getting pissed and I mean about to hit this bitch. Finally when I got off the phone she wanted me to sit down on the bed. “You so yellous of me. You go home. Your dad es taken care of by me. We no need you here,” she says in her Mexican accent. I just grabbed all of our stuff and headed straight to the hospital. After begging the nurses to let me into dad’s room even though I had the baby with me they caved and let me in so I could say goodbye and give loves. He felt so bad for what she had said to me. He agreed it might be best if I leave so it doesn’t cause him any more blood pressure raises with her nagging him about it and all of her problems. Hello!?! Dad should be the only concern right now not you Nora!

I drove home 19 hours crying for about the first 8. If I would have had someone to watch the baby for longer periods of time I wouldn’t have left. If I wasn’t paying $40 a day for the dogs to be in boarding I wouldn’t have left. If I would of had money to stay in a motel I wouldn’t have left.

I’m very emotional right now and really wish Jason was home so I could vent and get a good hug. For all of those who have made it this far into my rant I appreciate the support. I apologize for this being so long winded.

So I did a very adult thing this morning and set up a Roth IRA. This is something I have no clue about and is somewhat nerve racking to me, sending in a monthly check and hoping that my money gets invested wisely and sets me up for a nice retirement. I know this is a very smart move on my part and something that needs to be done but I wish I was more educated on the stock market, mutual funds, and the sorts. Why do they not stress teaching us money management and looking to the future more in school? I feel a little lost but know that with time I would have made the smart choice when I’m 65 and my hardest choice I have to make is deciding between coffee or tea with breakfast.

After that hour long meeting this morning it was time to go grocery shopping. After driving an hour across town to get back to my city I shopped and headed home. When we got home I turned on the television while waiting for the baby to fall asleep. Not what I normally do. Why I did it? I have no clue. All of a sudden the remote was in my hand and the television was on. I got so wrapped up in a show that an hour had passed since the baby had fallen asleep. Once I snapped out of my television trance I went to get ready to workout and that is when I heard the call of mama duty. He had woke from nap and now it was time to be on baby duty. There went my workout time to myself.

Can’t promise myself that tomorrow will go any better with working out since I have a mile long to do list in order to get ready for a long road trip to my dad’s house for the weekend.

Why is it that a site that is set out to motivate and support a weight loss journey have advertisements for “quick fixes”? That is one thing I don’t understand. Shouldn’t there be links to low fat recipes, workout tips, and motivational messages instead? It’s annoying to me to constantly see this. Maybe it’s just me. Rant over.

Anywho… I worked my buns off today. 80+ minutes. I walked and jogged. I weight lifted. I enjoyed my cool down and stretch. I even took a moment to reflect on my life in peace while my son napped. I even had time to kill before he woke up so I started tidying up the house. I just wanted to keep moving. It felt so good. I know that when I wake up in the morning I will be so proud of myself for today’s accomplishments.

I noticed two new things.

1) I was actually looking forward to the high intensity part of my intervals while working out on the treadmill. I was able to jog more than ever. I don’ t know if it was because I kept telling myself I want this so badly or something else. Whatever it was I’m already looking forward to tomorrow’s workout to see if I can improve some more.

2) I’m starting to see my collarbone! Ha ha! How pathetic is that? Now if only this double chin would disappear.

Looking forward to another day of living healthy.

This afternoon while watching The Doctors they talked about a weight loss aid called the Tongue Patch. It’s a patch that is sewn onto the tongue and makes it so painful to eat that you limit your solid intake. You are on a liquid diet for a month. The Doctors did not think this was a solution for lasting weight loss since this teaches you nothing other than being a quick fix. A woman from “Prevention” magazine said that as long as good eating and working out habits were being formed along the way then it might be a good solution. I for one was so grossed out looking at the photos of this procedure my stomach was killing me. I would NEVER NEVER do this to myself. Anyone else ever heard of this? This was the first time for me. What will they think of next? Sewing your mouth shut?

I did great tonight out at Texas Roadhouse. I chewed a piece of gum until the food came out to prevent myself from eating too many rolls with honey butter. I even downed a glass of water before my food arrived. I stuck to what I knew I was going to order ahead of time since I browsed the online menu beforehand. Enjoying my 10 oz ribeye, mashed potatoes, and green beans was even more heavenly knowing that I kept my calorie count in check and stuck to my guns and didn’t give in to the basket of rolls.

On a plus side I even received two compliments about how beautiful I looked. It was such a confidence booster. I was already feeling on top of the world for working out this afternoon and that just pushed me over the top with excitement. I thanked them nicely and was beaming on the inside and had a grin on my face the rest of the night. It makes me want to continue taking care of myself better than I have in the past. Since having a child my appearance has fallen to the bottom of the priority list and running out of the house in an oversize shirt and jeans with flip flops became so easy. I really like the way it feels taking time to put some effort into myself inside and out.

Did anyone else receive a message about a casting call near Dallas for a new weight loss show from Holland?

I slept so good last night. I think I can conclude that it was due to working out yesterday afternoon. I woke up before the baby was even roused from his sleep. I’m definately not complaining about being able to get my morning going without having to keep a watchful eye over my son while I got ready for the day. An hour to myself was very nice especially once he woke up and he too was in the best mood.

After a cup of coffee Jason’s mom was knocking at the door. She was in the area and wanted to do lunch. We sat around and talked for a couple hours before it was lunchtime. We went to a Mexican restaurant that Jason and I frequent so I already knew what I was going to order and the calorie counts. When I ordered I stuck to my plan. Chicken fajita tacos with avocado slices instead of queso and no rice or beans.

Once we got home from lunch it was already time for the baby’s nap and that meant it was my workout time. After getting him down for a nap I got myself dressed and began my workout. I don’t know what the factor is but my body felt like I was pushing it too hard after 31 minutes. I was covered in sweat but my lungs weren’t on fire today like they were yesterday. I don’t know if it’s the climate change here in Texas versus Washington but I’m STRUGGLING to get into the groove. I understand that I’m not going to be at my fitness level overnight where I left off but not even being able to do a half hour  on the treadmill in consecutive days is frustrating. As I do step off the treadmill I don’t see it as defeat since day after day I’ve laced the Adidas up and gave it my all. I won’t not stop. I’m going to get there and my body will be back to tip top shape. Tomorrow I will take what it brings.

Here is how my workout looked for the day:

• 5 minute warm up on the treadmill at 3.0 mph for 0.25 miles - 33.7 calories
• 4 minute stretch with 10 second holds - 11 calories
• 6 minutes weight lifting with dumbbells - 20 calories
• 16.01 minutes on the treadmill at 3.5 mph - 69 calories

That is a total of 133.70 calories burned. Hey… it’s better than nothing. I’m moving and my body is doing wonders for me. I’m still moving in the right direction and losing weight. Yea me!

On a side note… Biggest Loser tonight was such an emotional rollercoaster. When Abby shared her story of losing her kids and husband in a car crash I was holding my son rocking him and just looking at him and the thought of him not being in my life made me bawl my eyes out. I have no idea how she overcame such a tragedy as that. She is a true fighter.

Here is how my menu looked for the day:

Breakfast:

• naughty me… coffee only… 37 calories

Lunch:

• 10 tortilla chips and 2 tbsp salsa and 2 chicken fajita tacos with 2 slices of avocado - 651 calories

Dinner:

• 2 cups of pork and beans - 420 calories

That is a total of 1168 calories consumed. I really consumed more than that. Often times I think we all forget to factor in those bites here and bites there. I did take a couple bites of my son’s banana pudding dessert. I know that I got over 1200 calories consumed and then some.

Week #1 Thanksgiving Challenge:

Tuesday:
Exercise (1 point/every 10 min.): 3 points… walking and weight lifting
Eat Healthy: (yes= 5): 5 points… staying within 1200-1500
Personal Challenge (yes= +5, no= -5): -5 points… didn’t take my multivitamin
Weigh-In: Saturday: (loss = +10, maintain = +5, gain = - 10): N/A
Weekly Cumulative Total: 8 points